I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
