No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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