I have demons in me.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
