Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
