He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
