i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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