I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Randomize