I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
