But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Do vagina's smell?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
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is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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