Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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