yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
