lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
