Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
