I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
