After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
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