We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
