why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
