i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Randomize
