What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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