i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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