He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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