After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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