Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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