I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
