So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
