Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
