Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
