i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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