I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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