You work out of a Hotel?
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
