I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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