i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
