The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
