Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
