I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Help. Why am I so naked?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
