do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
