I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize
