But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
vagina is talking i cant
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
