matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
