how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
