He passed out mid-signature
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
