did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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