i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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