who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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