Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
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I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
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I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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