Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
he puts the penis in happiness.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
