she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I just found puke in my bra..
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize