Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
