I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
