Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize