Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
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his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
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30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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