All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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